Without fear or favour

Written by Tammy Milne – PDA TAS Director

You know that thing when you hire a cleaner and then go around making sure that the house is tidy enough for the cleaner because you are embarrassed and you don’t want them to think you are hopeless?

You know that feeling of dread you get when you have to “ask your cleaner to do something?”

It’s like you are asking a huge favour and they are not obligated at all to comply. I mean seriously, are they are doing you a favour coming into your home for money to wash your clothes and clean your bathroom?

Okay, let us take out “cleaner” and insert “support worker.” 

Why is it that so many disabled people (including my self) feel nervous and scared of rejection if we ask support workers to simply do their job?

I often hear myself asking “can you do me a favour?” if I am asking them to check the mailbox, get the bins in or make me a cup of tea. It feels like I’m imposing. Does this happen to anyone else or is this an internalised ableism?

I don’t think so. When we talk about the relationship between support worker and disabled person there is the warm and fuzzy – the helping and gratification model of support work, where the person is a hero for preforming the work, rather than a dedicated professional engaging in their work.

In contracts or “service agreements” there are “how we will treat you” and “how you will treat us” clauses that speak of mutual respect and kindness.  So why does it feel like I will hurt a support worker’s feelings if I cancel a shift or choose someone else to do a shift instead of them? Is it the worry that they won’t come again and I will lose their services?

In looking at the “how we treat you”, there is a gaping hole of detail that does not acknowledge the power imbalance, the trauma that a disabled person carries with them, and the unique and personal experience of discrimination, subjugation and ‘othering’ that the person with disability has been a victim of all their lives.

We should be skilling our support teams with trauma informed practice. They should least have a basic understanding of how their presence is in fact that of power over us. 

How many times have I heard “that client was mean” from support workers? Seriously, that person has a complex and difficult life and your feelings are hurt?

We are doing a disservice to professional and skilled support workers by allowing our leadership to allow the rogue element of workers, motivated by money, rather than professionals to populate the workforce – but how do we make a standard that protects everyone?

Scenarios that make us fearful include support workers not turning up for a shift or ringing at the last minute to say they are unwell.

Similarly, gaslighting where a support worker says that they don’t feel well and so, to make it easier on them, you scale back their work for the day and change your plans, so that you do not go out.

Also, If we change their agreed hours from say 8 hours to 5 hours and this results in their sudden inability to work for you anymore. They reason that they just cannot make ends meet with a reduction of hours.  I mean with no overheads other than insurance and a base rate of $67 they are not that bad off.

These are real situations. 

So how does policy and quality and safeguards protect the person with disability?

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